Here’s the thing. Even if I had started Fields, Oliver would have cut one of his bye-weekers to start another IDP. Instead, he gets the win with 11 players, and I get Trey Benson. Once Lamar was ruled out, I gave up on the win and just wanted to have fun. I had a shit ton of fun, and I actually stayed in the game until the second half of the Monday night game. I wouldn’t, like, do it again, but I enjoyed myself.
I also enjoy Oliver staying in the fight, if only because it’s one fewer playoff shoe-in with an elite QB. Y’know… I say that, but without Lamar and Allen doing unicorn stuff, there’s really not that much separation between QB1 and the field. The difference between Mahomes and Jordan Love (QB11, plays for the Mortydome team that would most likely acquire Mahomes) is like 5 FP per game. It’s nice, but it’s not the 10 FP per game that separated Lamar from QB11 last year; it’s the 4.5 per game that separated Lamar from QB2 last year.
I am still 0% trippin’. Lamar is back (right? RIGHT?!) and the strategy this year was always about Lamar and Henry. It would be cool to have one more good player, and I’m pretty sure I can get one once mathematical elimination creeps in. Here’s what’s interesting: next week, I play the 1-7 team, and the other four teams with losing records play each other. We are pretty much guaranteed mathematical elimination for two teams next week, and the only player in those matchups playing on Monday is Marv. Get those offers in now, get them in Sunday afternoon, get them in Sunday night. Hammer ‘em.
This one was all Shelby until Sunday night. Spencer’s team was just too solid, with the two lowest scorers above 6 FP, compared to Shelby having three players under 6 FP. Spencer has a complete lineup. Shelby is heating up at the right time, but to hit six losses with six weeks left in the regular season, she has no margin for error. She should get to 4-6 in the next two weeks, sitting in eighth place before she faces Evan and Sean. If she’s 4-6, that means she knocked Corey out of contention, and she has the inside track to trading for his best players. You put Bijan and JSN on Shelby’s team, and Herbert, Gibbs, Brown, and Odunze keep doing what they’re doing, it’s not crazy to imagine Shelby taking down everyone on her schedule except Sean. Max and Coleman are in freefall, and Coleman has the worst schedule remaining. I can see the Week 13 standings showing a playoff field of Sean 11-1, Spe 10-2, Evan 8-4, Cam 7-5, Max 6-6, Coleman 5-7. So if Shelby can win two and split the Evan-Sean series, she can be tied with Coleman, who she currently has more points than. So unless I get my shit together, she’s the likeliest team right now to sew up that 6-seed. With Sean’s team just out of control, maybe it’s not worth buying your way to a mere playoff berth. Since we re-seed, 6th seed plays the 1st seed in the second round. You really want to buy into a position that helps you avoid Sean until the championship.
I am still more or less ignoring Spencer as a threat to Sean. Though they are tied at 7-1, though Spencer is second in scoring, Sean is first by 220 FP, and among playoff teams, Sean is actually “allowing” the most points. He is regression-proof. He is infinite. And he’s getting Puka back at some point. All Spencer can do is try to swing a trade to upgrade WR and RB, try and load this lineup by making an aggressive offer for Bijan and JSN. If Brian is willing to trade Tucker Kraft (don’t do it, Brian), then adding Kraft and Chase is a solid swing, too.
This was always going to be a bad week for Corey. Nothing has changed even after losing by 100. He’s still tied with Shelby and Brian, just one back from Oliver (I apologize), and he faces Shelby, Kennedy, and Oliver in his next three. It’s starting to look like Corey and Shelby are playing for pink slips in Week 9. If Shelby wins, she gets JSN. If Corey wins, he gets Gibbs. That’s how this should work. And if I ever win another championship, that’s how it will work. No I will not be more specific.
There’s something weird about how dominant Sean is and how cursed Brian is. I’m not saying Sean has made a voodoo doll, but there’s gotta be some Google equivalent, some amount of surveillance and targeted advertising to convince someone to curse themselves, yeah?
Kennedy has broken his curse, and friends, if you think starting 0-7 and trading away your top two picks will doom your season, you haven’t been paying attention. Kennedy’s next four games are me, Corey, Spe, and Oliver. And Kennedy controls Rivalry Week. He has extra picks. The trade deadline is the final minute of Week 13 action. Kennedy can claw back to 6-7 and buy a couple hammers for the melee, sneak into the 6-seed, win, and get annihilated by Sean in the second round, if he puts his mind to it. If he believes. I mean, can’t you buy Jeanty back for the 4th you got for Hampton right now?
Brian should keep fighting because everyone should keep fighting until they’ve guaranteed a losing record. I really don’t think this is a year where we’ll see a losing record make the playoffs, but if Shelby and Kennedy are both going on runs, then something gotta give. Shit, this is crazy. But in order to take down Goliath, you need a David. You need a true underdog, not an evendog. You need these pre-cooked teams surviving the fire and coming out stronger because of it. HOLD THE LINE EVERYBODY.
Dumb and bad. Essentially Joe Flacco, Robert Spillane, and Kaden Elliss took down Josh Allen, Chris Boswell, and SirVocea Dennis. There were six players in this matchup held under 2 FP, and four of them were on the winning team. I want to throw up.
Mortydome Matchup of the Week lived up to its billing! Cook led the week in scoring, weeeird shit happened, and this matchup came down to the final three minutes of Monday Night Football. It could still flip in stat corrections, but Cam would need a 1.5-point swing. So far the biggest correction this year was Oluokun getting +3 by adding a PD; mostly it’s a 0.5 swing here and there. It’s not looking good for Cam. I want to issue an apology for pumping up the Bears’ LBs. They were both ass this week. Had Cam doubled up on Browns LBs, he would have won. He also could have gone a million other ways at WR instead of locking in on Darnell Mooney. But Evan had a dude score 45. The fantasy gods are only capable of so much cruelty.
Corey, Brian, and Kennedy are bad teams with big budgets. Spend that shit.
QB
1. Darnold
2. Kyler
RB
1. Tracy
2. Cardinal Crap Shoot
WR
1. Christian Watson
2. Jameson Williams
3. Troy Franklin
4. Chim Dike
TE
1. Njoku
2. Juwan
K
1. Jake Bates
2. Chad Ryland
DL
1. Khalil Mack (@TEN)
2. Jonathan Cooper (@HOU)
LB
1. Oluokun
2. Campbell
3. Ernie
DB
1. Quentin Lake
2. Budda Baker
3. Jordan Battle
