Ooh La La 163 – 151 Jacobsfuscation
Cameron chose cash over a matchup win.
De’Von Achane is twice as good as Some Trash Asshole.
IDPs are making or breaking my week every week.
Seminole 153 – 131 Money
Brian got good and his best player got hurt (again).
The Cardinals are kind of good, like, good enough that the back-to-back Conner-Hollywood picks look borderline sharp.
Jerome Ford is nine times as good as Derrick Henry.
K-Bop 187 – 123 Ghost
Hutch out-Watts Watt with the money stats.
Coleman had two 40-pt players, one of whom is the overall RB1, cemented to Coleman’s bench.
The silver lining of a blowout is it absolves you from starting the wrong guys.
Dave 189 – 163 Piss
The redemption arc maybe flies too close to the sun as Max ships off Breece Hall for Sam LaPorta.
CJ Stroud is that dude. Keenan Allen is that dude. Zack Moss might be that dude?
Next man up: Kennedy was forced into this lineup. Literally injuries to everyone on his bench except QB; would’ve won by 11 even if he started the wrong QB. HOWEVER, had both of these teams started the QB they’d started the first two weeks, Max would be the league’s sole 3-0 team.
Lamb God 150 – 104 Jaguars
Calvin Ridley leads the league in drops.
D’Andre Swift is now an everyweek start in fantasy.
Spencer, for the 50th year in a row, has too many good WRs.
Chasin a Win 124 – 112 Tag-Man
124 in win for the second-lowest scoring team in our league.
Marvin Mims would have won this game for Oliver.
Corey’s RBs can’t score double digits.
Waivers totally sucked this week. RB is bare.
Breece Hall for Gus and LaPorta is a choice. The sticker shock was real, but I actually don’t hate the trade. Fourth-dimesionally, after the Jets get a real QB, this will look pretty bad. But LaPorta is a late keeper who might just be a top-five TE for the next twelve years. Like, actually.
I have three IDPs with a Week 5 bye, and I’m not willing to drop anyone. So if you want Lavonte David or Antoine Winfield, throw me a draft pick.
Ooh La La over Tag-Man
CMC-Kamara-Rhamondre vs. Mixon-Javonte-Kyren
Lamar (@CLE) and Mahomes (@NYJ) have literally the worst two matchups, but Mahomes has the edge since the Chiefs will have the ball way more than the Ravens.
Oliver is one of three teams with worse WRs than me, and he’s one of 11 teams with worse IDPs.
Jacobsfuscation over K-Bop
Mostert and Achane stay on these guys’ benches.
Close matchup comes down to Cameron having better IDPs and Josh Jacobs finally scoring 20 FP.
Coleman wins the cash game (assuming he submits a pick).
Roy 2: Dave over You Don’t Pay with Money
One of the few weeks going forward where Fields over Stroud makes sense.
The ‘Ders d-line actually has the juice to stop the Tush Push.
Kennedy’s team is so much better, and the matchups are in his favor.
How to Play Fantasy over Seminole Smackdown
Jags bounce back, Ridley revenge game in London.
Brian lost two more starters (MikeWill and Derwin).
Josh Allen needs 60 to earn Brian the upset.
Piss Master over Chasin a Win
Corey needs to trade for a real starting RB and start Jameis Winston.
Max’s team is gross and weird but also good for 150 a week.
Kyle Pitts outscores Sam LaPorta because TE is stupid.
Ghostface killers over Lamb of SunGod
Love conquers all.
Shelby doesn’t bench her best players.
The Bills solve the Dolphins.
Feeling grateful that we never agreed on word-minimum for the note. Peace.
